Don’t ever let yourself be used…..

“Sometimes we want someone so badly that even though we know they are using us we can’t let them go. I can’t explain why”

Do you know what it feels like to be happy and sad at the same time? To be so in love with someone and at the same time know that they are not true, but you are so in love with them and just can’t bring yourself to leave them. So you stay and let them pretend they love you . Then when you are alone you cry in silence. You go out with your friends and you smile on the outside or you may drink too much hoping to numb the truth for a little while, knowing that you are going home to a lie. And every time he tells you how much he loves you the pain just stops your heart because you know deep down it’s all a lie.

If only you could accept the truth it will set you free.

You go through the motions everyday pretending to be a happy couple and in love . Only you know all along its only a lie. You cry yourself to sleep every night pretending to be  happy, because you have nowhere to go so your waiting for them to show their true self all the while hoping it will never happen, that if you can just be perfect he will really love you. Be perfect in every way shape and form. He doesn’t realize that you can see through him so he goes on pretending. You see, you have something he needs or wants and when he doesn’t need it anymore he will be gone and never look at you again . Because the user doesnt need YOU  he needs what you have.  You can be gone tomorrow and he wouldn’t give two shits. Its not about you. It’s about what he needs from you what he is using you for. It could be money or a car or a roof over his head or sex. So please don’t ever let this happen to you. Be smart about who you give your heart to…and who you trust with it.

Listen to your in inner voice it is there for you when you are blinded

The user is typically extremely charming or good-looking . Even if you are hot too, remember it’s not about you, it’s about what they can get from you. Do not ever give into lust over your gut feelings. If you feel it isn’t real it is because it isn’t . When the red flags are there do not just ignore them, because in the end what you will go through will be much more painful than you being with someone just because you want them and they need your possessions. They do not WANT you, they just need what you can do for them and what you can give to them.

You will become so disgusted by the lie eventually you will be repulsed by their presence

Be strong, value yourself, know that you ARE beautiful and deserve a real true love. Someone who will love you no matter what you can do for them . If you gain a few pounds if you don’t feel like wearing makeup and if you want to wear sweats everyday and a pony-tail and he still thinks you are beautiful. That will take care of you when are sick and not leave your side until you are well again mentally or physically. That is real love. When your world comes crumbling down. The person who is by your side picking up the pieces with you is the one who loves you. The one who leaves and wipes the crumbled pieces from his feet as he walks out, that is the person who just used you.

This is the moment when you realize everything you have thought about was true! All the times you told yourself is it in my head? You were right about everything. It was all a lie.

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Having been a huge fan of Sex and the City and also being from New York City I decide to start a blog after I became single. I am getting over a broken heart. What I write may not always be nice there is still some pain, but It will be the truth of my experiance some of what I went through and some of what I have learned. In the end I would love to help even one person move on quickly from heartbreak and never have to go through the hurt and the pain that I allowed myself to let linger. I moved to South Beach for my present Job and to start over. My blogs will be related to love and relationships in one way or another because like Carrie I am still searching for my Mr.Big. “Maybe its time I be clear about who I am. I am someone looking for love…” - Carrie Bradshaw, 2004, Sex & the City Series Finale Welcome to SexandMiami.

9 thoughts on “Don’t ever let yourself be used…..”

  1. All of those things that you describe in the last paragraph are what real romance is all about. It’s not flowers and gifts and empty promises and expensive dinners. It’s just being there and loving you through it all.

  2. Hello Dear…you are healed…Can you, in your beautiful and powerful writing style…write for us your beloved audience, a story, a vision in clear descriptive detail, you IDEAL mate. I know this will be an incredible experience for this next phase in your life. You are in the preparation time right now…for a little while…summons your true love…let’s pretend we are 7 years old again…can you imagine… 😉

    1. i feel so strongly about what happen to me that I felt a need to write it in the emotion I felt as I lived through it. I am over it and I look forward to writing about my ideal mate even though right now that is the last thing on my mind. I am going to write it for you! As your wonderful words of wisdom have helped me through this painful process. You are a wonderful life coach and you have a gift for feeling emotional scars of others.
      I am sure your words of wisdom have helped so many, because for me they have been like a guide sent from heaven and I am so thankful to have found your blog. I refer many people to read your work becasue it touches so many different areas of human emotion. And your advice is priceless. Forever grateful for your kind advice thank you so much 🙂

      1. Wow, Thank you! If I can be human for a moment, your kind words brought a tear to my eye. It came from feeling the success of the initial intention of this movement, to give folks a symbolic refuge. A place to go to find comfort and to erect the needed scaffolding around them. So he or she can rebuild, reinforce self-worth, self-confidence, most importantly to cultivate enlightenment-and that notion alone brings a remarkable and unmovable strength through faith. I designed it by the laws of nature in that if we can first understand just the notion of our journey then the recognition of someone else’s journey…we can recognize when we’ve gotten beyond something that we now notice another person has just moved into. Hence, spreading compassion starting with the self first. I Thank you greatly for your continued support. I am here. I will be traveling again soon…not to worry, I’ll be posting away once I get settled.

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